Pastor Mary Haley

I have been seeking to encourage you to understand the value and importance of the people within your “inner circle.”  Carefully choose the people you allow to influence you.  Within that circle you need a great mentor.  Christ wants to be your Ultimate Mentor; one on one times with Jesus cannot be replaced.   However, God also brings mentors who will help to bring growth and development to you and your life dream.  Let’s look at an example from the Bible.

Every Christ follower is also required to be a leader or mentor of others; it is how the Good News is spread throughout the world.  Elijah was the mentor of Elisha (1 Kings 19; 2 Kings 2)).  It was God’s plan to spiritually groom Elisha through this strong prophet, Elijah. What types of things did Elisha learn through this connection?  Elisha began to understand his leadership call in life, how to wait patiently for the right leadership timing, and the necessity for surrender to divine Lordship.  It is the way we grow and develop into all God is calling us to be as His people.  A mentor is someone who takes a great interest in you and is willing to share and release things in his/her realm of spiritual influence to allow you to grow in character and develop as a leader. Be careful when choosing your mentor; choose someone who really models the love and grace of God. An immature and self-serving mentor is of little value in your inner circle, because he/she will halt your spiritual progress. 

When Elijah had completed everything God had intended him to do on earth, he said to Elisha, “Tell me what I can do for you before I am taken away.” Elisha said to Elijah, “Please let me inherit a double share of your spirit and become your successor.” (2 Kings 2:9)  In the will and purposes of God, Elijah’s spirit rested upon Elisha as he continued living a powerful life in connection with God.

The Holy Spirit gives every believer amazing spiritual gifts (1 Cor 12:4).  These gifts are unique and diverse.  I like to think of them as complementary gifts.  You might ask, “Complementary to what, Mary?”

The gifts God places within the people around you are to be complementary in their relationship to you.  As well, your gifts are to be complementary in relationship to others.  God works in different ways; the gifts we each have also work in different ways.  We need to make sure we bring people with diverse gifts into our inner circle.  Warning!  The enemy is very crafty; great as a Liar.  Many times the enemy will stir up your soul by getting you to second guess the intentions and motives of the people around you; to get you to be jealous of the spiritual gifts of others. People who can offer you pros and cons to your thinking are valuable to you.  Celebrate them; avoid feeling threatened.   Don’t buy in to the work of the enemy; he’s divisive and doesn’t want God’s gifts to unite.  Why?  Because there is great power in that place.  So, be excited about the gifts people around you have and find a way to allow them to personally help you to grow and develop.  Your life is about “your” journey.  No one can take or rob you of your value and place in God’s kingdom.

God views us as many pieces of love that should fit together to make one in Christ. The Bible says it this way, “A spiritual gift is given to each of us so we can help each other.” 1 Cor 12:7 

Agape–the pure and passionate love of God–seeks to heal everyone who pursues our Maker.  This love has been given to those who believe in the human manifestation of Love–Jesus.  Jesus lived the passion and now teaches us how to love.  We, too, must live to release the passion.  It is essential, therefore, that we spend time with passionate people; people who love God, as well as love and value other people.

Frankly, when we say we love and belong to God and we cannot even love the people around us with whom we disagree, we are babies in agape.  We need to learn from people who better understand God’s love.  Let’s look closely at the people around us. If we choose to spend time with some who are more mature in living agape, we will grow and flourish.

“All who love me will do what I say.  My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them.” John 14:23 

Acquaintances are nice.  Friends are better.  We all need to surround ourselves with people who really care for us and want us to succeed in life.  The people in your “inner circle” need to be chosen carefully.  As we recently discussed, bringing folks in who have experience to share will make your circle powerful. The people who will make your circle solid are those who have a heart for God; people who are built on the Rock.

God desires to be first in our lives; life came from God.  Therefore, when you invite people into your inner circle, make sure he or she is a person who has placed God first in his or her life. They will serve as role models in their relationship with God.  Remember, your inner circle is made up of people who are going to help you become all that you were created to be; they celebrate your potential and are willing to make the journey with you.

So, be very selective with whom you allow to influence your life.  You need people who place God first and uphold His values.  These people will ignite your faith and hold you accountable to the necessary spiritual growth and development.  If you surround yourself with people who have no passion for God; your dream will dwindle.

People watch people; others are always watching us.  It is a little scary if you think about it long enough.  That makes us influential regardless of our position or job.  Certainly, this knowledge puts a great deal of personal responsibility for our choices on the line, doesn’t it?

If we are calling ourselves Christ followers, people will be looking for Jesus to show up in our choices and decisions. Our choices make us credible Christians.  Jesus was all about making choices that were other-focused;  making decisions based on how they benefited the people around him. He went from one “life moment” to another thinking about how he could bless others with God’s love.  You might say, “Mary, come on that was Jesus.  He was the God-man. That was his purpose.”  Yes, but if Christ lives in us, do we really think his ways and desires to touch lives has changed?  I believe Christ in us still wants to stop along the way of our days to touch lives.  You and I will need to make the necessary choices that allow Jesus those moments.

“Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the Good News of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness.” Matthew 9:35  “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8

We are influential whether we realize it or not; others around us are watching. We can be influential in good ways, or poor ways! We must choose; make a decision.  It is a personal responsiblity. We are called by God to be a credible people; our life needs to match our words and our motive should be to add value to others.  As Christ followers, are we soaring in credibility?

To answer this question, it might be good to examine our “consistency” meter.  God calls us to “be” authentic people; the same person no matter who’s with us. It is human nature to want to impress some folks; we can compromise our testimony when we seek to be a people pleaser.  Be consistent no matter who you are with and live right before God.

“Even children are known by the way they act, whether their conduct is pure, and whether it is right.”  Proverbs 20:11

We have been discussing how to “connect” with difficult personalities; people who are a challenge to love.  God’s grace is always available to give us the strength to be loving to others.  Now, whether we respond and receive that grace is another thing, isn’t it?  As important as it is to learn how to positively influence and minister to everyone around us, it is essential that we pay attention to the people we invite into our relational inner circle of connection because they will influence us.

A challenge for you today:  Do you bring people into your inner circle who have positive and rich life experience?  These folks have been down the road a piece and contain great wisdom and tools for your life.  Set yourself up to learn and gain essential understanding from them; invite them in and connect.  Tap into Christ in others and you will find a great treasure.  “In him lie hid all the treasure of wisdom and knowledge.”

God is the Creator and he has made many kinds of people; many different personality types.  Some people can be a challenge when it comes to making relational connections.  These challenges can be good as they cause us to work toward unity.  God calls us to be One in Christ Jesus.  Well, that certainly will take some work!  Because we are more powerful together than in isolation, we need to press through the difficulties to find a way to “connect” with one another.  Today’s difficult personality is a drag to the emotions: The Downer.

No matter how full the glass seems to you, The Downer will not be able to see it.  This person struggles to entertain a positive thought; negativity is the benchmark.  Life’s challenges have robbed his/her ability to grab hold of the greater Hope. Sadly, although this person might have great potential to be a leader, no one will allow him/her to lead because they would drag everyone around them down.

Possible Coping Strategies:  Extend compassion and seek to paint a new picture of life for The Downer.  But for the grace of God, the Lifter of our heads, we could all wind up living life as The Downer. Can you testify that life can rob you if you allow it?  It is only when we set our focus on things above that we have Hope; live for eternity.  If you and I only looked at our circumstances, we would be BLUE…too.  Honesty is really important when dealing with The Downer; he/she may not realize how negative they sound.  It has become a lifestyle; a comfort zone.  Put on the love of Christ, call forth a heart of compassion, and tell those who tend to be negative how that spirit affects you; tell the Truth. Don’t cater to the negativity; confront it.  God just might be calling you to be a positive mouthpiece that brings discipline to another of His children.  Will you be God’s mouthpiece to lift The Downer?

“No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening-it’s painful!  But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” Hebrews 12:11.

Our chat about different personality types continues, today, with a focus on The Dreamer.  Oh, how wonderful it is to dream and live in the “way beyond,” but this person has difficulty coming down out of the clouds to get something done!  Do you know The Dreamer?

The thing that makes The Dreamer difficult is that although his/her ideas are amazing and they can talk to you about one idea after another, most of the time they do not have the strategy portion thought out.  Now, for those of us who lean on the personality side of “git-r-dun” we really may feel like stringing this person up by their toes.  But, cut them some slack, because many times The Dreamer does not know how to manifest the dream in tangible ways.  This person can be a real challenge to deal with if you are trying to work with him/her on tasks or jobs that have a deadline.  The Dreamer wants to talk and we are frustratingly waiting at the starting gate looking at our watches!

Possible Coping Strategies:  Remember, most of the time this person is not trying to annoy us; that is not the motive.  A visionary–The Dreamer–just needs to connect/partner with a strategist.  It is important to help The Dreamer develop his/her gifts further; to help bring an action skeleton to the ideas.  If we can help him/her see that an idea will work and this is a way, then we can help them begin to think further in how to make the idea happen–stretch the thinking and build excitement.  This will cause The Dreamer to feel valuable.  Don’t let The Dreamer stay in the clouds; share God’s love by helping him/her grow and learn how to manifest a dream.

“Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.”  1 Peter 4:8